If only men could be privy to the things women say when they get together to share a couple of cocktails and a rich meal. They’d be shocked, appalled, maybe disgusted, and incredibly titillated. Arguably, men may be a lot more crass about their topics of conversation, but women can be jaw-droppingly detailed.
We decided to chronicle the sordid conversations (and the delicious food and libations) of a typical Girl’s Night Out.
It started with drinks at a gorgeous Downtown Los Angeles bar called The Edison during their Depression-era Happy Hour where you can get one hand-crafted cocktail for thirty-five cents and it ended with a steak and desert binge at the nationally-famous Fleming’s Steakhouse, where we got to sample their signature ninety-nine calorie Skinny Girl cocktail–the Tickled Pink.
We also snagged the recipe!
Here are some highlights from our girl talk!
On crushing on dudes that just aren’t compatible with you:
[pullquote quote=”Because you’re attracted to it. You want to corrupt him. Nothing says, ‘I love you’ like ‘I hate you.”]
Sunshine: “Years ago, I got a crush on some guy for like two weeks. He’s thirty-something. He’s never had alcohol in his whole entire life. Never had caffeine ever in his whole entire life. Hasn’t had meat since he was like three.”
“He just doesn’t have any fun qualities that are compatible with my lifestyle. But for some strange reason I couldn’t stop thinking about him…I just hated him so much that I was so attracted to him.”
Miranda: “Because you’re attracted to it. You want to corrupt him. Nothing says, ‘I love you’ like ‘I hate you.'”
Sunshine: “I think I choose people that I hate because then I know nothing is going to happen. I’ll be physically attracted to them and hate their personality so, so much. And I’ll know when it comes down to it, I’ll be able to stop myself because I hate them.”
Miranda: [laughing] “You are so a** backwards.”
What’s our idea of a really horrible date? Go to the next page to find out!
On what their idea of a really horrible date is:
[pullquote quote=”Grown men don’t just want to hang out with you. The don’t want to be your friend. Ever. Men only pursue actively a friendly with you if they want to sleep with you.”]
Miranda: “When you don’t know it’s a date! That’s horrible.”
Sunshine: “What do you mean? Like, he says ‘Let’s go for coffee’ and it’s just casual?”
Miranda: “I’ve been on three pseudo-dates in the last two weeks where it’s like ‘Hi. Let’s get together and do something.’…I wanted it to be a real date, but he never tried…There would be flirting back and forth but there’d be no contact.”
Sunshine: “And you didn’t know it was a date?…It could have been a date, but maybe he just wasn’t clear with his motives or what he wanted from you.”
Rachel: “Grown men don’t just want to hang out with you. The don’t want to be your friend. Ever. Men only pursue actively a friendship with you if they want to sleep with you.”
“My brother-in-law told me this on my first day of college. He was like, ‘Let me tell you something. These men. These boys. Do not want to be your friend. Any guy who actively pursues time with you, as opposed to you originally pursuing it with them, they only do it with women they want to sleep with. Men only pursue friendships with women that they are attracted to. Period.”
Another friend broke it all down . Find out what she said on the next page!
[pullquote quote=” Bottom line: You weren’t picking up what he was throwing down.”]
Rose: “I’ve never heard of such a thing. Did he pay?”
Rose: “And did he initiate it at all or did you call him on redial?”
Miranda: “No, no. I’ve never contacted him.”
Rose: “Then it was a date. Why on earth would you hang out with you otherwise? He likes you and you probably weren’t coming on strong enough.”
Sunshine: “I can see that. Sometimes you act naive, like you have no idea what is going on. The fact that you are even questioning that it was a date was kind of naive. Not to be mean or anything.
Rose: “Bottom line: You weren’t picking up what he was throwing down.”
So what happens when you move past dating and are thinking about moving in with one another? Read our musings on the next page!
[pullquote quote=”In my ideal world, my boyfriend and I would have separate houses.”]
On when it is acceptable to move in with you significant other:
Rose: “After you’re married. I think it’s fine when you know you are going to marry the person.”
Miranda: “We can file taxes. I don’t really want to live with you.”
Rachel: “Helena Bonham Carter and Tim Burton live in separate houses that have a passageway between the two.”
Sunshine: “In my ideal world, my boyfriend and I would have separate houses. We kind of have separate bedrooms.”
Rose: “My boyfriend and I are moving out and we’ve been together for three years. But we’re staying together.
Why did Rose ask her boyfriend to move out and how does she feel about that? Go to the next page to find out!
[pullquote quote=” Maybe we could actually have the relationship that I had signed up for.”]
Sunshine: “Are you ok with that?”
Rose: “No. Yes. I want it, but I don’t want it. I’ll want it until he moves out.”
Sunshine: “What’s the decision behind that?”
Rose: “I think I need space. ”
Sunshine: “Is he ok with that?”
[pullquote quote=”It’s scary to do the right thing.”]
Rose: “No, but he’s also not ok with how miserable I am. Living together. We moved in for financial reasons and we did it because it was the right thing to do at the time.”
“What most couples do is they say ‘Well, since we’re already living together there’s no way you can possible go back. But I told him that there is no way to possibly go forward and live like this.
“And so there is such thing as going back. Even though we’ve been living together, we weren’t ready. We moved in for the wrong reasons.
“Maybe if we had learned to go back and were more mature about it by starting over more slowly the way it should have been if money weren’t the primary motivator. Then maybe we could actually have the relationship that I had signed up for.”
“It’s scary to do the right thing. It’s easier in a lot of ways to have him stay and for us to live together because it feels safe, but it’s not right.”
Why does the chemistry dissipate when couples move in together? Go to the next page to see what we said about that!
[pullquote quote=” Even though there is so much love, it becomes mechanical.”]
On how the magic can die when you start living together:
Rose: “I want to be courted. I want to miss him.”
Sunshine: “My boyfriend and I see each other like ten minutes in the morning and maybe an hour at night. And then on the weekend, but it’s like, we’re just best friends now and, yeah, there’s like the element of romance, but I do miss the times when we only saw each other like two or three times a week and every time it was a date.
“We’d go places and do things.
Rose: “You stop seeing this person. I was crying hysterically last night for about five hours, that’s all, and I was thinking about how I had forgotten how in love with him I once was…I look back at this time and thought, ‘How I used to really love this guy.'”
“And now I look at him and I don’t even recognize him. I don’t even see him as a person. He’s just a thing.”
Sunshine: “A thing that does stuff for me.”
Miranda: “Even though there is so much love, it becomes mechanical.”
Sunshine: “It’s sad.”
Rose: “We take each other for granted.”
What does the girl newly in a relationship think about this? Find out on the next page.
[pullquote quote=”I never understood when my single friends would say, ‘I want a boyfriend.’ I had gotten to a point the past year where I loved being single.”]
Rachel: “I can see that happening. I’ve just been dating my boyfriend for three months and he cooks for me. He’s a really good cook. But I guess eventually you get used to stuff. Like even the first couple of weeks, I was like ‘Oh my god. He does everything for me.’ And now I’m like, ‘You wanna go get my laundry from downstairs?'”
Rose: “You can let that not happen.”
Sunshine: “You can recognize it.”
[pullquote quote=” Luckily, the good news is: Feelings aren’t facts. So just because you feel it doesn’t mean it’s true.”]
On finally being ready to date:
Miranda: “For a really long time, I was really unavailable. And I think I still kind of am. But I think I put on Twitter the other day…I was in my bed with thirteen pillows, I was freezing cold and I thought, ‘I really wish there was a warm body next to me right now. It’s been a really long time.”
“I feel like I’m kind of sort of ready for that. Maybe. It’s scary.”
Rose: “See, there’s girls like you. I wish I was like that. I don’t know what it’s like not to be in a relationship.
Miranda: “I just want someone to squeeze and be really affectionate towards. With no motive. For no reason.”
Rose: “You hear some women talking about how they want boyfriends and for me it’s totally different–I’ve never been alone.”
Rachel: “I never have said that when I was single. I never understood when other women said that. It’s been like five years since I’ve had a boyfriend. I never understood when my single friends would say, ‘I want a boyfriend.’ I had gotten to a point the past year where I loved being single.
“And I just recently decided not long before I met my boyfriend that I wasn’t even interested in dating. I just wanted to do my thing and focus on myself. ”
We decided that a lot of our identity was invested in men and Rose gave us her breakdown on why it is important to resolve problems as young as possible. Read what she said on the next page!
[pullquote quote=” Just because you feel it doesn’t mean it’s true.”]
On identity in your late-twenties:
Rose: “What people don’t understand, or what I didn’t understand until recently, is that our twenties are meant to learn lessons. If we don’t learn the lessons, they show up later and in a different form. It’s almost like we get retested in life and we get a chance to do it differently. So, if you learn these lessons early, you have really good later years, because you’ve resolved a lot of the issues that you would eventually have to resolve.”
“We all have to go through these things. They manifest differently in everyone’s life. Some quicker, some slower. But at the end of the day we all have to deal with these things. There’s no point in regretting the past or shutting the door on it.”
“Luckily, the good news is: Feelings aren’t facts. So just because you feel it doesn’t mean it’s true.”
So, besides delicious food, what fueled our intense relationship talking? Gorgeously crafted cocktails from The Edison and Fleming’s Steakhouse, including Fleming’s Steakhouse new signature ninety-nine calories Skinny Girl cocktail called Tickled Pink.
We got the recipe for you so you can drink it with your friends!
The menu is all the same aside from the new low-cal cocktail the Tickled Pink, the skinniest of the skinny cocktails, so now we are focusing on the girl’s night out and low-cal aspects of the menu in efforts to highlight the drink. How girls can survive the big steakhouse with the best meal for the fewest calories.
Our special 99-calorie cocktail.
1 oz. sugar-free raspberry preserve
1 orange wedge squeezed and dropped into shaker
Shake on ice
Pour 1-1/2 oz. of Mionetto Prosecco in martini glass
Pour contents of shaker into martini glass with Prosecco
Garnish with 2 fresh raspberries on a bar pick