by Matt Dolloff
New Year’s Resolutions are notoriously hard to keep. It’s often because the goal is too big, or simply unattainable. But you also need to take responsibility for failing to stick to it.
We here at Mix 104.1 wish all of these celebrities can adopt these New Year’s Resolutions we’ve suggested for them, and actually follow through. Some of them have to try harder than others, but successful resolutions would make life better for everyone involved.
Some of these people are only important around here, while others will have fans worldwide waiting to see what they do. We’re looking at you, Bruno Mars…
But there’s also Mayor Menino, who we hopefully still get to see on TV, and the Boston sports teams who are oh-so-close to winning a championship. And maybe winter won’t be so bad this time around?
Here are 10 New Year’s Resolutions we hope become realities in 2014:
Taylor Swift: Write a song about something else, for a change
We’re not knocking Taylor Swift’s songwriting ability – she is clearly awesome at it. But when you write literally every song ever about a failed relationship or past romance that didn’t live up to your expectations, that can get tiresome. Swifty needs to liven up her subject matter with some diversity – maybe about things that make her happy? How about a party anthem? Because if we need to hear (and begrudgingly love) one more song about your ex…
Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen: Spend more time in New England
They’ve got their castle in California, but soon they will have a mansion in Brookline – so there’s no reason to believe Tom & Gisele won’t be around here more often! Hopefully for the Patriots’ sake Tom spends some of his off-season here working out, and it would just be cool to have more major celebrities hanging around town for much of the year. Have your camera ready!
Mayor Menino: Find a way to stay in the public eye
For us, the saddest part of Mayor Menino’s retirement is the thought that he might not make as many public appearances. His shortcomings in the public speaking department have become endearing to Bostonians over time, and they can only get better when he doesn’t have the responsibility of running the city. We don’t want to lose that. But hey, he’ll always be “Mayor Menino” to us and surely he won’t completely disappear…Right?
Kim Kardashian & Kanye West: Make it through the year married
Assuming KimYe make it happen and tie the knot at some point in 2014, the first goal should be to outlast the sham of a marriage that was the 72-day Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries experiment. Then the goal should be to make it through all of 2014 without a divorce. Then we’ll see what happens from there. This doesn’t look like a celebrity marriage built to last, but stranger things have happened.
Red Sox: Prove to everyone that 2013 was not a fluke
The Red Sox will field roughly the same team in 2014 as the group who improbably won the World Series in 2013, so there’s no reason to believe they won’t be in the thick of the playoff race once again. They also have an up-and-coming star in Xander Bogaerts and plenty of young pitching coming up through the farm system, so they should be able to sustain the success of the 2013 turn-around – but they still have to execute!
MBTA: Expand late-night service
The MBTA is officially expanding its service past 3AM on weekends starting in the spring, and it’s up to you, the passenger, to make it a success. There will surely be thousands upon thousands of people stumbling out of bars at 2AM glad to be able to hop on the T instead of grabbing a taxi, especially in areas like Faneuil Hall. Once it proves successful, it’s up to the T to make the service permanent all week. You can do it!
Danny Ainge: Get a superstar player for the Celtics
This is easier said than done. For the Celtics, it’s practically impossible to lure a big-name free agent to Boston, so their best option for acquiring a superstar player is through a big trade or the draft. The draft looks out right now, because they’re playing reasonably well and won’t finish in the bottom 5 of the league, so Danny Ainge needs to pull off another version of the Kevin Garnett trade from 2007 – trade several medium-to-small pieces for one major piece. It’s not impossible, but many strings need to be pulled for it to happen.
Yuengling Lager: Get back here sooner rather than later!
Yuengling Lager is officially returning to Mass. liquor store shelves in 2014 after over 20 years away, but an official date has not been set. Can we set the date ourselves? January 1. Please and thank you.
Mother Nature: Go easy on us this winter
It might already be too late – there’s reportedly 6+ inches of snow on the way this Thursday and Friday. But once that’s out of the way, maybe Mother Nature could take it easy with the snow and extreme cold weather…Maybe???
Bruno Mars: Dominate the Super Bowl Halftime Show – and maybe win some new fans
Bruno Mars is a superbly talented artist with plenty of big hit songs under his belt, and he’s squarely in the prime of his career – the perfect recipe for a Super Bowl Halftime Show performer. But he also has his fair share of doubters. Hopefully for his and his fans’ sake he can prove everybody wrong with a spectacular performance in New York while the whole world watches on Super Bowl Sunday.
SEE ALSO: Your Guide To First Night Boston 2014